It’s been brewing for a while, and now it’s finally happening: the Human Farm is expanding, and we’re setting up a new operation across the border in the States. This feels like a turning point, the start of something big, but we’re going to need a steady hand and some strict structure if we want to make this work.
There are already whispers of Femcans in every corner of the country eager to start their own farms. It seems our network has quietly spread farther than we realized, and the States have a much bigger pool of…enthusiasts than we ever thought possible. But with that growth comes the need for order. A few of us have been talking, and we’ve agreed on ten rules to keep things running smoothly as we expand. Each new farm will follow these to the letter if they want to operate under the Human Farm’s umbrella.
So here are the ten rules, fresh from the board meeting, for every Femcan setting up shop in the States:
1. The Mark of the Farm
Every LP must be branded upon arrival, no exceptions. This mark ensures the LP is tied to the farm that claims them and prevents any disputes between farms. No mark, no claim.
2. Secrecy Above All Else
The first rule of the Human Farm Network: protect the network. No outsider may know the nature or location of any farm or be made aware of our operations. Any Femcan who compromises security faces expulsion—and more.
3. Harvest Season Limits
Each farm will have set harvest seasons. During these times, LP intake can double, but the rest of the year, quotas must be met responsibly. This keeps supply steady and avoids drawing attention.
4. Training and Bootcamp Standards
All LPs must go through a rigorous bootcamp, with standard training procedures followed across all farms. Only LPs who pass the full training can graduate to “Dinner Invite” status, and those who fail go directly to processing.
5. Farm Ownership and Independence
Each Femcan farm operates independently but must adhere to network standards. The leader of each farm must maintain absolute authority on her territory. Conflicts between farms are to be resolved through negotiation, not by infringing on one another’s LPs.
6. Respect the Sausage Rule
All Femcans agree to respect the allocation of prized cuts, especially sausages. Femcans must consume a full LP before taking a second prized cut or arrange a trade. This rule ensures fairness and avoids unnecessary greed during the feasts.
7. The Feast of Unity
Once a year, all Femcans in the network will meet at a designated farm to celebrate the Feast of Unity. This gathering is a chance to share resources, swap techniques, and reaffirm our commitment to the network.
8. No Poaching
Femcans are forbidden from recruiting or capturing LPs marked by other farms. Respect each other’s territory, and never encroach without permission from the farm leader.
9. Supply Chain Consistency
Each farm is required to contribute to the supply chain, with a portion of their processed LPs allocated to supply the entire network, ensuring every farm has enough to meet its demands.
10. Expansion Approval
Any Femcan wishing to start a new farm must obtain approval from the network council and follow the necessary security protocols to set up operations without drawing unwanted attention.
With these ten rules in place, we’re poised to grow stronger and more united. I’ve already heard from Femcans in Texas, California, and New York who are eager to get started. They’re already scouting locations, picking the perfect, secluded spots where they can build their own farms, hidden away from prying eyes. We’re taking it slow, keeping the structure tight, but there’s a sense of momentum I can’t ignore. The Human Farm Network is growing, and soon, we’ll have branches across the map.
For now, though, I’m heading back to the main farm. There’s a lot to organize before we can go full scale, but we’re moving forward. It’s only a matter of time before we make our mark.
Until the next move,
Femcan Lana